Four Lines

I carried my _____ like a ______
in a ______, but I
________________________
________________________.

Do with them what you will. <-- Never say those words to immature, freshman - gone - kindergartners. This is what resulted.

I carried my wife Erica like a princess
in a fairytale, but I
dropped her.
She requested a divorce.

~ R.S.

Pure genius. We revised it during lunch though, so now it's:

I carried my wife Erica like a princess
in a fairytale, but I
cheated on her with Courtney,
and now she wants a divorce.

There were some really funny ones that weren't so much inside jokes though. These might not be totally accurate.

Taehyun (based off of "American Gothic"):
I carried my pride like a pitchfork of an angry man
in a painting, but I
never realized that my wife
was looking at me.

Mehul:
I carried my doll like a baby
in my arms, but I
dropped him and
he got hurt.