Running out of Time

I feel like I'm running out of time. Ugh, this always happens near the end of a break, and sometimes as an aftereffect of watching a drama.

So for the break part, I feel like I have so much I need and wanted to do, but haven't gotten around to actually doing. it makes me stressed. I still need to memorize piano pieces, practice for the Chinese EP contest, and study for Science Bowl. I just feel like I won't be able to finish! And I so wanted to learn the dances to a few of my favorite songs, sing the (personally customized/created) versions of my favorite "You're Beautiful" songs (with piano), and a ton more...

And then the aftereffects of dramas is that I undoubtedly go look up the actors/actresses in the drama. And then I find out they're like, my sister's age. Then I go on YouTube and find out they're amazing at not only acting, but singing and dancing too. And they all started at my age, if not... 10 years earlier? And they're so good at what they do! So I look at myself and think, "What the hell am I doing?" I can't act, sing, or dance. I'm not particularly good at anything. I keep telling myself I want to do something, but then I lose interest. I have tons of things I planned out for myself that I haven't carried through with, and by now, it's too late. I guess I could try to do some stuff now, but... Ugh, I just hate this.

But on a happier note (well, potentially dangerous note), I really can't get over "You're Beautiful!" It's not like it's amazingly outstanding. I mean, it's really REALLY good and all, but it doesn't blow all the others I've watched away. But I don't know, I just can't get over it!!! -sighs- So I don't think I'll get around to watching more dramas this break. Maybe if they're short. It depends. I think I'll go obsess more now, and put my life plans on hold. Again. Like always.

You're Beautiful!

Yeah, I'm talking about you. You're beautiful.
No, I'm kidding. (Well, I mean, you could be beautiful...) The drama is rather beautiful though! I mean, the drama picture thing is just heavenly! -sighs- I'm never going to get over this... Second favorite, might even tie with Magicians of Love if the ending is good. Don't read if you don't want spoilers.

Anyways, Tae Kyung's smirk is really bothering me. And his pouty weird lip rolling thing. And he actually looks sort of weird when he smiles (in my opinion), but maybe that's just because he like, barely smiles. He's cute other times though, it all depends. Geun Suk seems really awesome in real life though, like when he's joking around with Shin Hye. He's not all that bad looking either. He's cool.

Awww Mi Nyu (acting as Mi Nam) is so stupid though! She sort of annoys me. -sighs- But she's hilarious at times too. And Shin Hye is AMAZING. Totally a triple threat; she's going to make it BIG. (As if she hasn't already...)

(<-- What a hottie!) But I feel so sorry for Shin Woo! He likes her so much... And keeps getting rejected... -sighs- If I was Mi Nyu, I would have gone with him a long time ago; he's pretty much the perfect drama guy! Except Richie. =P Well, Richie's more like, protective due to the circumstances. Shin Woo is a bit more realistic, he's almost like the older brother figure in protecting Mi Nyu. (Hey, Hsiang, if you're reading this, go learn from them!) It's so sweet when he follows her around and buys her ice cream and clothes and everything... She totally could have found out how much he loved her then, but stupid Tae Kyung had to call... And then it was so sad when he was making up the love story, because it was everything he wished could have happened between himself and Mi Nyu... And then when he said, "I haven't confessed to her, but already it feels like I've been rejected a hundred times." I cried so much for Shin Woo... He had to stand by and watch her get close with Tae Kyung...

Favorite character has to be Jeremy though. (Another hottie! Only he's more adorable. =P) He's sooo cute and funny!!! I love him! Awhs but it's so sad when he cries! He really loved Mi Nyu too... But he's just like a little kid in every other aspect! Including his voice when he talks to his dog. He's like, "Jolieeeee..." It's pretty funny. Plus his hair totally suits his character for this drama! Not many Asian actors (or actresses) can pull off platinum blond hair. But he does it! He's awesome!!!

Yoo He Yi and Mo Hwa Ran are just bitches. He Yi gets better near the very end, but Mo Hwa Ran just pisses me off. -.-

And the reporter dude! He's such a retard! Geez... It's just so funny when he comes back and ambushes Mi Nam (the real one), insisting he's a girl. He rips off his jacket and is like, "Uh. What? No boobs? o.o" It's pretty dang hilarious.

On another note, I want a pig rabbit! That doll thing was adorable!

But yeah, I love this drama! Yay! =D

*****

Anyways, I finished! And I still agree with my opinion that it's hella cute. The ending wasn't bad, but it did leave a lot of loopholes, so definitely not outing Magicians as my favorite. It's probably in my Top Five though, with Magicians, Koizora, Hana Yori Dango, and Romantic Princess.

But anyways, like I said, lots of loopholes.
For one, are Manager Ma and Codi really having a baby? She seemed like she had not idea what he was talking about.
And then we never really meet Go Mi Nam... Or find out what happens between him and He Yi.
Then Shin Woo and Jeremy still like Mi Nyu, but Shin Woo says he let go, so Jeremy "became" happy after leaving his treasure bus, so...
Then whatever happened to Kim Dong Jun? Was he just there for conflict? He was pretty cute actually, but they pretty much just said he's going to be in the military and had him leave.
Plus, does Tae Kyung forgive his mom? He said he couldn't at the time, but then he called her "Mother," so I'm thinking he does? But they never really resolved that issue.

But whatever, it's amazingly cute, and really sad at times too. I still love it! =D

Merry Christmas!!!

My Christmas was rather interesting. Opened all the presents that actually required opening, tons of which were food (yay!!!). =D I got a stuffed Golden Retriever from Ross, with a card that made me laugh. XD It shows he actually listens to me (which is rather amazing, since I rarely listen to myself) and knows what one of the the most important aspects (to me, at least) in life is (dramas) and what pisses me off (physics homework). But yeah, it was pretty nice.

My sister and I had some very nice bonding time together today though. No, we didn't talk about life. No, we didn't bake cookies or brownies together. We played Tap Tap Revenge! Heck yeahhh!!! I think she's obsessed. ;P

My dad's old friends came over too, and we went to China Wall Buffet, which wasn't that bad, but is sort of a sad excuse for a buffet. Oh well. -shrugs- Yeah, that family's kids are crazy smart. Like, both studying to be doctors at John Hopkins smart. Plus the elder one, a sophomore, got a 4.0 GPA freshman year. o.o But from what I heard, he's not very social... Guess you can't have everything in life.

Anyways, I hope everyone had an awesome Christmas!!! And I can't wait to see some of you at the LOTR marathon tomorrow!!! =D

Ice Skating!!! <3

It was so much fun today! Ross and Jillian couldn't come though, so that was sort of a bummer. Anyways, ice skating was hella cool and everything (except for the fact that I really can't skate for heck), but the real awesome-ness of the rink was the gigantic snowball fight that happened.

So anyways, I had a pretty big one with Augustus near the beginning (which someone filmed, and is probably going to post on Facebook) where I totally got ambushed, but chucked a few back at him, so that was rather fun. But they left before the actual HUGE one happened. So the zamboni, or whatever it's called (the thing that sweeps the ice), dumped the huge block of snow onto the middle of the rink, so everyone had a MASSIVE snowball fight, it was SO much fun! I really wish it would snow here... But anyways, Brandon stuffed a snowball down my shirt. -.- But I got a few headshots so it's all good. =P And then he and Hsiang totally smushed snowballs over my head, which I returned, and Lucy and Brandon attacked each other like crazy. It was awesome.

But then we had to leave in the middle on account of me. Sadness... But basically, I was getting another snowball ready, and this little kid came by and stepped on my pinky (remember, we're wearing ice skates here). It sort of hurt, but I didn't feel much pain or anything (my hands were so numb by then), and I didn't see any blood at the time, so I just kept chucking snowballs, but then my finger started bleeding like crazy. I mean, like CRAZY. I stuck a snowball on it, but it didn't work that well, so we had to go get me a band-aid. And I swear, by the time we got into the entrance place, there was this mini river of blood flowing down my pinky; it was sort of disturbing. o.o

But we went back and threw a few more snowballs. Then we left and went to Cafe Tapioca, where Brandon totally DROPPED his watermelon smoothie on the floor, and broke his cup. -sighs- What a failure. =P But yeah, that was interesting.

Then we walked around, went to Michael's (then Brandon had to leave) and Burger King, went back to Michael's... It was pretty awesome. Then we were GOING to walk to the mall, but Lucy decided not to show us the way, so... =( Oh well.

So yep. I lost my admission sticker sometime when we were walking around though. But whatever. I am SO coming back here next Christmas to see if they dump out the ice block thing again; that was AWESOME! =D

Drama Guys!

We really need them in real life... -sighs- In drama, the rich, handsome, cute, sweet, and amazingly romantic guys always go for the girl who doesn't seem to be that special... That's why they're so amazingly awesome, because they make any girl feel like she can meet her Prince Charming. But in reality? Guys like that don't exist.
Guys don't randomly confess their feelings to you with roses. They don't steal kisses from you. They don't save you from embarrassment or anything. Drama guys belong in real life. But they only exist in dramas.
Even if they did exist in real life, would they really fall for the girl who isn't that pretty, that smart, that talented? I doubt it. They wouldn't fall for us, the average girls. They'd chase after the pretty ones, the smart ones, the more talented ones.

We need drama guys in this world... They're so cute, and sweet... -sighs-

Epic Asian-ness!!!

I was going to put this on my FB status, but my mom forbid me. -.-

But anyways, I just walked downstairs to get some food, and what do I see on the counter? A freaking bag of free Costco samples (brownies and Madeleines). Literally. XD

Merry pre-Christmas guys! This is how Asians survive the holidays.

Winter Break!

YESHHHH!!! Yay, I'm so happy! I'm going to watch Prince Turn Into Frog, and have a LOTR marathon, and go ice skating with frosh buddies, and prob bowling too! Yay! I'm so psyched!!! W00t w00t!!!

And of course, I will ignore the fact that I have homework, the EP contest, Science Bowl, and piano. Which basically means I'll still be hella busy with crap. Oh well. =P

*****

Anyways, today was epically AWESOME! We had a party with donuts and yummy cranberry-grape juice and other food. And Rock Band! And then Lisa and Pink Bunny made me put makeup on. Or rather, they told Rizelle to put makeup on me. So I went through school (and Kumon) with mascara, foundation, and purple eyeliner.
Mr. Shack wasn't here for math, except the first 10 minutes, so we "watched" a really boring math lecture movie, then we watched Shrek! (The first one.) It was funny though, because when Mr. Shack was leaving, it took me a while to register that he wasn't coming back, so I pretty much screamed, "Wait, Mr. Shack!" He does his "glare," says, "What?" and then I tell him to catch and chuck a goodie bag at him. It was fun. =P
Then in English, we watched "The Little Shop of Horrors," which was a rather disturbing film, and played Scrabble! Yay!
And in Euro, we watched "Joyeux Noel," which is some war film. It was really interesting, but I was tired, so I slept through the last hour of it. =P

I gave out tons of goodie bags and stuff, it was awesome! I got these adorable penguin earrings from Lisa, LOTS of food [awesome Chessmen crackers (I'm assuming) from Courtney, cookies from Robyn (and a $15 iTunes gift card)], and random candy and chocolate. =) It made me happy.

*****

Kumon was pretty easy today. I gave everyone a candy cane, and Mrs. M got these Ferrero Rondnoir chocolates that are really good, and apparently she ate some and shared them with people, because she came up to me halfway through and said something like, "Those are DELICIOUS! They're really good!" So yeah. And then Clarie gave out goodie bags with gummie bears in them, and Gael tortured one. He stabbed it with a sharpened pencil (and left the lead in there), stapled it twice, and drew "blood" with a red pen. It was ather interesting. it was so hilarious though, it totally made my day. =D

So yeah, I had a really enjoyable day. Volunteering at Border's Gift Wrap tomorrow! Come donate to GAKAB!

One More Day and then WINTER BREAK!

So yeah! Two whole weeks (plus some) of pure bliss and being awesome with friends! (Why yes, I did ignore the fact that I have piano, work, a Chinese speech contest and Science Bowl to prepare for, and homework.) I can't wait! =D

Anyways, yesterday, Mrs. M (my boss at Kumon) took us out for dinner. It was really good. Sort of awkward, since it was mainly just the adults talking, but like, near the end, Mrs. M was like, "So, does anyone have anything they want to say?" And I whispered to Nari and Abby (joking), "One of us should totally just be like, 'I'm quitting.'" Then people asked me what I said, so I looked down at the table, and said sort of quietly, "I'm quitting." And seriously, people just went totally silent. I got asked 3 times by people making sure I was kidding. It was hilarious (for me at least). Mrs. M was probably like "Wtf?" though. I wonder what she would've done if I was serious... That would have sucked...
We went to TopThis! afterwards too. Froyo is soooo good! How to win my heart. Step One. Buy me froyo. Lots of froyo. ;D

So I probably don't have to do much tomorrow; at least I don't have any tests. We're having a party in Mock Trial, and easy days in English and AP Euro. We'll probably still have to do crap in math though... -sighs-
Oh well, I get to dress up in my red, green, and white outfit tomorrow! No Santa hat though, too troublesome. I have headbands! And then my two big paper bags of goodie bags and presents. =P It's going to be awesome! I love giving out things; it makes me so happy! Good thing this only comes around once a year though, because I really think I spent more than $50 making all these goodie bags and buying candy and stuff for people.

So anyways, tomorrow's going to be fun. Then the two weeks after that are going to awesome! Yay! Now I need to go to bed. =P

She's the One

We sit on the playground swings.
I look at her,
Her raven hair softly framing her face,
Those shining eyes gleaming like jewels.
She's the one.

We sit in class, passing notes.
I glance at her,
Her forehead creasing slightly as she thinks,
Those slender fingers drumming on her desk.
She's the one.

We sit in the food court of the mall.
I gaze at her,
her legs crossing as she picks up a fry,
Those feet tapping a rhythm on the floor.
She's the one.

We sit in the movie theater.
I stare at her,
Her eyes glistening with tears at a sad scene,
Those pink lips quivering.
She's the one.

We sit on a couch in her home.
I marvel at her,
Her heart belonging to another,
Those hand, never to be enclosed in mine... but...
She's the one.

Years later, I sit alone, miserable.
No longer able to look at her,
Her spirit dissipating away,
Those beautiful eyes glassy and glazed.
She was the one.

The priest reads an excerpt from her diary:

"We sit together on my couch.
I tell him I'm marrying another,
His mouth forming no protest, no declaration of love.
Those feelings will never be mine.
I'll never admit it, but...
He's the one."

Poems!

So anyways, I was typing up that poem I wrote last time, and I came across a LOT of my old poetry. I actually wasn't that bad at writing poetry... I'm sort of bummed that Mrs. LaHive kept my old poetry and I never got half of it back. Oh well. So anyways, I figured I'd put up a happy poem this time, to counteract the depressed mood of the last one. (And for the last time, I am NOT depressed. I just get mood swings. And I had a really long week, with lots of tests and crap going on. Even though I did discover a lot of my poems are depressing. What's up with that? o.o)

The Question

If I could teach you how to fly,
Or how to bake a cherry pie,
Or make the streets with gleaming stars,
Or compose etudes on your guitar,
Or if I was the smartest, the best,
And still had the time to party and rest,
And if I could teach you all of these ways
To walk with ease through life’s maze,
Or if I knew the way to heaven,
The sounds of the night, the luck of seven
And owned them all, to keep or lend,
Would you come and be my friend?


The Answer

You cannot teach me how to fly.
I love the cherries, but not the pie.
The streets won’t gleam in the light of day,
And my guitar is just for display.
You are neither the smartest, nor the best,
For if you were, you’d have no quest,
You cannot navigate the maze without fear,
You can’t teach me that which isn’t clear.
The way to heaven cannot be shown.
The luck of seven cannot be known.
You cannot keep, you cannot lend,
But still I want you for my friend.

Fuzzy Pajama Pants!

I got new ones at Aeropostale today! Early Christmas present (thanks Pink Bunny! =D); they made me so amazingly happy, it's rather sad. But whatever. Now I have two polyfleece ones (a star one and the Aero pair), and a plaid flannel one which is also rather warm and awesome. Yeah, I find it amazing how happy I can get from pajama pants. But if you look at it this way, I've never actually had like, legit warm, fuzzy pajama pants before. Like, up until 3rd grade, I sometimes (well, usually) wore "tomorrw's" outfit to bed, because I figured its clean, very comfortable (I never wore jeans until 7th grade), and I can sleep 5 min more! Yep, I was such a nerd. I'm sort of surprised I had friends. Well, I guess no one really cared back then. No wonder my sister was embarrassed to be seen out in public with me (you've got to remember that when I was wearing my weirdly-colored stretchy fabric outfits, she was an 8th grader with some self-esteem to keep up). I mean, I would have been embarrassed. And then from 3rd through 9th grade, I wore either shorts or those long sort of fake-silk/slippery material PJ pants. So this is the first time I've actually had legit PJ pants. So I guess that's why I'm so happy. XD

I'm sort of thinking whether I should buy some plain colored long sleeve thermals too. Like, to sleep in. I mean, just one or two. It's not like I won't layer them/wear them to school either.But I don't know. I'd sort of feel like I'm using money which I don't have to use. -shrugs-

But the point is, I love my pajama pants. All three of them. =D

*****

So we had Kevin's b-day party today, which was pretty chill. We pretty much just walked around and hung out. XD But like, the guys all went to Victoria's Secret and bought him underwear. Girl underwear. More specifically, a thong. With lace. Yeah. It was awkward. But the funny thing was, this employee asked us if we needed help (obviously she probably doesn't see mobs of guys in that shop often), and after the guys said it was for a friend for his birthday, she proceeded to help us pick out types of underwear, colors... I think she thought he was gay. =P It was all rather amusing.

But anyways, it was pretty fun. =) I had a good day today.

Life's Memories

Hazy, blurred film reels play over and over again,
Muffled screams and shattered porcelain,
The lingering sting of a slap burns on my cheek.

"You're such a failure!"
The words ring in my head, mocking me.
A failure? Me? A failure...

What's my purpose in life? Why am I here?
Is there a point in living anymore?
Kill the torture, the never-ending agony.

When I'm gone, who will miss me?
Who will mourn my death, this "loss?"
No one.

The world has no reason to pay attention.
I haven't helped it in any way.
I never will.

I'm one girl out of millions.
A mere speck in this world.
A single grain of sand on a beach.

"You have the potential."
They encourage me with empty words and false smiles.
Potential? It's worth nothing. I have no motivation.

I move through life an animated corpse,
A shell filled only with excruciating pain,
Stumbling through this baffling maze.

They say life is worth its memories...
All I want to do is forget.
If my memories and worthless, what is life to me?

Worthless.

That's what I feel like right now. Absolutely worthless. Seriously. Sometimes I really wonder why I deal with all this sh*t. I'm not getting anywhere in life. I don't know what I want to do in life. Half the things I do are to maintain an image, a facade. Sure, they're part of my personality. but in reality, who really cares? If I went off and killed myself today, would it really matter? Oh yeah, my friends and family would be sad, and they'd probably come and cry at my funeral, but seriously, the world won't have lost anything that can't be replaced. I'm just one girl out of millions. One out of millions with the same potential as me. I haven't achieved anything yet. In fact, I think I've screwed up my life multiple times in the short 14 years I've been alive, it might be better to just... start over. No worries, no cares.

Do my grades mean I'm going to go somewhere in life? Maybe, but not necessarily. Not even likely. So why exactly do I work hard for my grades, to maintain the "smart person" image? Because it's expected. I'm EXPECTED to be one of the best. I'm EXPECTED to be smarter. It's all these freaking expectations that are stifling me. Sure, I'd probably still try for my grades even if my parents were more lax. I'd probably still GET the same grades. But at least it would be because of my own choice. I feel like I'm being forced to live up to other people's expectations. What about my own? What do I want for myself? I really have no idea. All I know is what other people want for me. What I want for myself has become dependent upon other people's expectations of me. Do I really have my own opinions, or are those only derived from the perspectives of others?

Now, I don't even know how to live up to others' expectations. I lie in bed at night and think. What have I done today? Learned about friction forces? Analyzed some literature? But what have I accomplished? Absolutely nothing. I've been called a failure before, and now, I finally feel compelled to agree. I'm barely maintaining my grades. My extra-curriculars are meager. Where exactly am I heading in life? I feel like sometimes I have no ambition, no purpose. Some people know exactly what they want to do, what they want to accomplish, and how they want to leave there mark on the world. What about me? Nothing. I don't know. Sure, I want to be successful in life. But how? By what means? How am I going to pave my own road? Do I want to be successful in a sense of being the CEO of my company, of being relied on by other people, of working by myself to discover new technologies? I want to be happy. But how? Do I want to be rich and famous? Do I want a humble living with a loving family? Do I just want to live day by day, cherishing each moment of life? What am I doing here?

I look at my friends around me, and it seems like they all have some sort of knowledge about what they want to do in life. But what about me? What do I have? I look around me, and my friends all seem happier than me. Sure, one might argue that maybe I'm smarter, maybe I'm better at this and that. But really, why does that matter? All I want in life right now is to be happy. Okay, so part of that involves keeping my grades up, of course, but I don't believe I've actually discovered true happiness. Ross says that he's content, and that I'm too happy sometimes, but now I'm really beginning to wonder if I'm just content as well. Am I truly happy? If I am, would I be asking myself this question? What defines true happiness? I guess in a overall sense, I'm happy, but when I think about the details of my life, I feel so lost.

Sometimes I do get depressed. Yeah, it happens. And when it does, I wonder if it would really matter if I killed myself. I know it sounds selfish, but would it really matter? My family would always remember, of course, but I'm not the only child; my sister can be the shining star. My friends will probably look back in 10 or 20 years and think, "Oh I remember this one girl killed herself in high school... It was so sad..." But would they wonder where I'd be if I had lived? Would anyone wonder? I doubt it. If I don't know where I'm going in life, where I want to wind up, how would they? The world would move on. One more dead girl? Just add her to the list. It's okay, she didn't accomplish much before she went off and killed herself. All I've done in life so far is take up space. If I died right now, there's no reason the world should remember me.

I feel like I had more ambition when I was a kid. I strived for my goals. When I reached them, I set new ones. I WANTED myself to be the best. I took pride in knowing that I was going to grow up, and be envied by others, and have a successful living. When other kids were off playing, I was inside reading books, doing math, learning. Sure, I was a nerd. But I had the motivation. What do I have now? When did I start losing my goals in life? Where am I going? What am I doing here?

People in This World...

Sometimes they really piss me off. Hell, sometimes I piss myself off. But I just need to rant right now, so I'm listing some things that people do which really just annoy the hell out of me. I'll probably add to it in the future even.

The Drama Queen
Okay, so these people are usually girls; don't ask me why. Maybe it's just a gender thing. -shrugs- But seriously, stop making your affairs sound so amazingly stressful and more complain-worthy than ours. Half the time, they're things that everyone goes through. Another 49% of the time, it's your own damn fault. And the 1% that's actually slightly worth complaining about? You make it sound like the world's going to end. Seriously. This just makes you look like a little brat who can't handle life. Okay, so your parents told you you need to improve your grades. You make it sound like if you don't get a 95% on the next test, they're going to chop up your body and shove it in the river. You even throw in some tears. Seriously? In reality, your parents aren't happy with your grades, but you know, given your B's in half your classes, they shouldn't be. They want you to be better. But don't make it sound like they're murderers just waiting for you to get a B on your next test. Even my parents aren't that bad, and this is coming from the girl who freaking CRIED because she got didn't finish one of Mrs. Begg's tests in 7th grade. Tough up. It's life. We all have problems. DEAL WITH IT.

The Phony Perfectionists
So first of all, if you keep repeating that you're a perfectionist, you really can't be that much of one. I'm friends with some of the craziest, most legit perfectionists ever, and trust me, not a single one has actually admitted to being a perfectionist. They might admit to being a little OCD, but none of them say, "OMG, this project took so long! It's not even that hard, it's just because I'm such a perfectionist!" Like, the actual perfectionists will admit to themselves that they're perfectionists, but they never declare it out loud. It's just retarded. Why would you want someone to know that you can't handle something being crooked or out of place?

The Liars/"Slacker" Braggers
Liars in general piss me off. Just tell the truth already. It's not like embellishing yourself with lies is going to make us like you more. But for these purposes, I'm focusing on liars in school. As in,
"OMG, we have a test today! Did you study?"
"No."
Okay, some people actually say this honestly, like Eric Tu. He doesn't need to study and everyone knows it. But when it comes to some people, even if they don't need to study, you know with their personality, they definitely studied. Maybe they didn't stay up half the night, but they at least cracked open the book and reviewed terms or things. Some things I really don't study for, like chemistry, but if you ask me if I studied for physics or Euro, it would just be retarded to say no. Obviously I studied. Just admit it. There's nothing good in pretending to be a "slacker" who still gets perfect grades. There's nothing good in BEING a slacker who gets perfect grades.

The "Subtle" Show-off/Attention Seeker
Okay, these are the people who use covers to brag. Like this one guy got his score back for the PSAT. Highest one I saw today, so obviously he was proud of it. But does he go around just saying he did really well, which is annoying enough already? No. He uses his "crappy" grade in critical reading, which is still really good, to shove his PSAT score sheet into your face and fake being really disappointed in himself. Stop it. We can see right through your stupid little act. When my friend congratulated him for doing really well, and he acted surprised that she knew, I literally told him, "Well you've been waving around your score sheet anywhere, obviously she'd know." Did he have a comeback? No. Because that's exactly what he wanted. Attention. To let people know he did well. If you were really mad about that "crappy" score, why the hell would you go around showing people? It's like me running around with a test I failed and screaming, "HEY GUYS, LOOK! I GOT A D-!"

The Secretly Vain Ones
Also mainly girls. Okay, this girl shows up at school in tiny short shorts and a skimpy tank top, in the middle of WINTER. Everyone thinks she's crazy and asks her why the heck she'd wear that in the middle of winter, and what does she say? "Oh I don't know, I really don't care anymore." Yeah, well, we all know you just wanted to be "pretty." Just admit it. "I felt like being pretty today" or "I felt like dressing up today." No one's going to look down at you for wanting to be noticed. We all want to be noticed; everyone's self-esteem gets a boost if you think/know you look good. But pretending you rolled out of bed in freezing cold weather and just randomly decided to wear tiny shorts that barely cover your butt to school? Yeah. Not so much.

The Moochers (Not in Food)
Okay, this seriously annoys me, and probably tons of other people as well. People who come up to you, and only talk to you when they want answers to homework. Really? You think I don't notice that we never talk unless you want to know the formula for sodium bicarbonate? Sometimes I really just want to look at them and say, "You know what? I don't feel like sharing my answers with you, because you'd never talk to me if we didn't have this class together, and if you didn't need help. So go find another person to copy answers off of. B*tch." But of course, I don't want to be mean. So yeah, it's nice knowing that I'm the person you come to for help, because it means I actually know my stuff, and you think I'm nice enough to help you, but seriously. I can tell if you'd talk to me otherwise, like if we passed in the hall. If you're my friend, duh, I'll help you. If you're some little airhead who goofs off in class, then comes up to me in tutorial and pretty much asks me to explain the whole freaking lecture to them, you can bet I'm not too happy about helping you. Oh sure, I'll explain it to you, and help you through it, but I really don't want to be doing this.
Oh, and even better? When they ask for your whole freaking assignment to "check their answers." As in, -coughs- totally copy everything. Plus, they don't even care if they understand the material, they just want the answers. I even had someone ask me to lend them my homework for the period, since our teacher only checks the homework and doesn't collect it. I was just like, "Wow, really?" It just pisses me off, especially in my harder classes, because I spend a good deal of time working my butt off to understand and finish that homework, and you're just getting the answers with pretty much no expense on your part.

The Complainer
Okay, everyone complains. But this is directed to the people who pretty much have a near-perfect life. You complain about parents hating you, yet you show up in brand name clothes. And I know you don't make that much money, if any, to buy them all yourself, because you complain about that too. You consistently say everyone is better than you, and has a better life, when, if you look at yourself, you're perfectly well-off. You say your life is horrible, yet somehow, you're gorgeous, awesome at a sport (any sport), have parents and siblings who love you (even if it's not obvious at times), and compared to the general public, you're extremely smart too. You complain about pretty much everything possible.
You complain about failing a test. Yeah, that's your own fault. Like, I'll talk about it too, but I know when to stop, because it's my own damn fault for not prepping enough. Obviously I didn't understand the material or I wouldn't have flunked. Stop complaining about how the test was impossible. If it was impossible, everyone would have flunked; that didn't happen, so obviously it wasn't impossible. And then there's people who complain oh so loudly about an A-. Shut. The. F*ck. Up. If it's a test in an easy class, okay, that's at least acceptable. If it's a test half the class failed, just close your mouth, because you're making everyone around you feel like shit. You might think you're just putting yourself down, but really? If I got a C and you got an A-, do you really think I'm going to care that you're not satisfied with your grade? No. I'm going to wish I got that grade. And you're going to make me feel like a retard because you keep saying how stupid you were to get an A-. If getting an A- makes you stupid, I must be mentally retarded then.
Oh yeah, and you "stress" about everything. Even if it's not anything to stress about. And you don't even stress quietly or moderately quietly like the rest of us. No. Your voice gets extremely loud, high-pitched, and whiny. First few times, I tell you it's going to be fine, just calm down. After you keep responding with something like, "But I can't calm down! Ahhhhhh!!!" I really just want to punch you in the face. Really.

If I wanted to complain, I could do that really well too. I can talk about how I'm not good at any sports, and how everyone expects me to be this smart little girl (yet I'm not doing so hot in more than half my classes). When I do well, it's no big deal, because that's supposed to happen. Yet suddenly, if I get a bad grade, it's like, "OMG, I beat Erica! Hell yeah!" How is that going to make me feel? I can talk about how I got hit as a kid for not doing well. I can tell you about how inferior I feel compared to my sister, who is taller, prettier, smarter in general, more responsible. I can tell you about the countless times I've gone to bed in tears, and cried myself to sleep because of lectures my parents have given me. Trust me, it's happened more than a few times. I can tell you how worthless and stupid they make me feel.
When you put it that way, I can make my life sound like shit. Sometimes I really feel that way. But do I? No. Because it's not true. I'm lucky to have expectations put on my shoulders. I'm glad that my parents actually expect me to be something. I'm happy that my parents taught me the importance of doing well in school, to be successful. I would rather know what it feels like to have someone be disappointed in you, and go to bed in tears, than to live life totally ignorant. I'm happy to have someone as awesome as my sister to look up to, to help me, to be my role model.

So really? Your life is fine. It's your perspective that needs to change.

*****

By the way, if you're reading this, it's most likely not about you. I didn't really have anyone in mind while writing this, except for that one example for the "subtle" show-off. It was more of just what type of people REALLY annoy me to death in general.