JUST About to Sleep...

And I turned on my Touch and 感 情線 from Magicians of Love started playing. (By the way, that's the song that still makes me tear up when I hear it.) Then I started thinking about dramas and emotions came up again (see previous post), and now I can't sleep. Damn.

Emotional Me...

So anyways, I was perfectly fine until the car ride to my lit class, then I started thinking about dramas and how cute they were and all that girly stuff about guys being so amazingly sweet and everything. So the whole car ride there and back, I was like, "I really want a hug right now..."

Then my emotions tend to get really screwed up every time this happens, so lo and behold, I almost started crying when I couldn't get on a bike today. Probably because a garage with the floor lined with uneven cardboard pieces isn't exactly an ideal place for someone who just learned to ride a bike to try to ride a bike, but hey. Yeah, I spent like 10 minutes trying to ride the stupid thing and I finally gave up and went inside and up to my room and seriously started tearing up before I was like, "What the hell am I doing?!" xD

But yeah. I just love when I get emotional. No way to really resolve it either, unless someone makes stuffed animals that can give you hugs on demand. Ah well.

Kitten Love ♥

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Day 22 - Someone You Want To Give A Second Chance To

Dear Everyone,

Yeah, you're included. Everyone makes mistakes. Everyone screws up somewhere, sometime in life. And so everyone deserves a second chance. I'd like to say that you only get one extra chance, and once you use it, that's it, game over, but that's not necessarily true...
And yeah, I'm a person who has a problem where I keep giving people chances even if they stab me over and over again. I like to believe that even if you're on your 49th chance, maybe it'll be different this time. You can't expect people to only make one mistake in life. Maybe one a day. But getting only two chances seems sort of harsh. Some might say that people never change... But I'd like to believe that all of us can if we work at it. And people might call me naive... I'd like to think that I'm just hopeful. =]

Day 21 - Someone You Judged By A First Impression

I don't even remember... I tend to revise first impressions pretty readily, so...

*****

Dear _____,

I'm really glad I got to know the real you and didn't keep going off that first impression I had. Even if it was pretty spot on, everyone deserves a chance to let people know more about themselves, and whether you turned out to be my best friend, a study buddy, or a total jerk, I'm glad I have that opinion of you because I got to know who you are, and not because I saw you once and judged you based on the feeling I had then.

Pretty Epic Day Today!

So anyways, Cory, Ross, and I went over to Simon's to hang out today. It was pretty awesome; we played some pool (after I learned). Had a few really crappy games, and quite a few hecka good ones. I think everyone had at least one epic game. Mine was when I pocketed all the stripes in 3 turns. xD But Ross and I still lost to Simon and Cory, because we couldn't pocket the stupid 8-ball, and Cory caught up to us. xP

Played some video games; Super Smash Bros and the like. Kept dying in SSB (I never did learn how to play that game xD) but I owned Simon and Ross in Soul Caliber 2. Then got epically killed by Cory. But meh. =P Had DDR too, that game is INTENSE. Apparently three songs on standard is a mile? Crazyyy.

Then we had our sundaes, of course. Bananas, vanilla fudge swirl ice cream, chocolate syrup, and maraschino cherries. =] Then for some reason, Cory was trying to tie a cherry stem into a knot using his tongue, and failing epically. Dared me to do it, so I did; it wasn't TOO hard, but it was hella frustrating at first. Simon eventually joined in later, but he and Cory never did manage to tie a stem.

So after a while, we got sort of bored, and so I was lying on the couch and everything, and the topic of biking to the park/Safeway came up. Then Simon, Cory, and Ross decided that I needed to learn to ride a bike TODAY, so we spent a good amount of time doing that. Fell a ton, and it was really hard getting my balance at first, but I can ride a bike now! Still sort of wobbly and stuff, but the point is, I CAN RIDE A BIKE. =D Almost ran into this Indian dude at the park though, sort of swerved into the tanbark. And I fell into the bushes a few times. And biked into a pole. And almost hit some cars. No trees were involved though! xD

Anyways, it was a pretty awesome day. =]

Day 20 - The One That Broke Your Heart the Hardest

Dear Mike,

You're such a jerk. You have no idea what pain you put my poor heart through. Actually you probably do. You burned it and shoved the ashes into a bag of used kitty litter. -sighs- You know, I spent a lot of time making that origami heart. Bored as hell since Jinx was asleep. =P Then you had to steal it and put it through that torture. What will I ever do with you? xD

"If you knew how much he loved you, you wouldn't be so quick to push him away."

Day 19 - Someone That Pesters Your Mind

Dear Dawn,

Only one other person will really get why I'm writing to you, and it's not even you. Hah, well anyways, I guess we'll see what this is all about soon. Not giving away the surprise! =D

AP Chem Summer Assignment

Successfully finished in one day! =]

Day 18 - The Person You Wish You Could Be

Heyyy girl. Remember me? I'm the you from ten years ago. It's amazing someone like me turned out to be someone like you. You with the great job, WONDERFUL friends, and loving family (even if it IS just Quenti). You, who actually has a life, but still graduated top of the class. You, who stays happy and optimistic even when it feels like life is stabbing you with a blunt (sharp? blunt?) object. You, who people still look up to, but with good reason to now. You're amazing. And hopefully, one of these days, I'll be where you are.

This is Freaking AWESOME!!!

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Sometimes I just want to hole up with blankets and stuffed animals, and cry every emotion out of my body...

Day 17 - Someone From Your Childhood

Hey Brandon!!!

Aha, hard to believe I've known you for what, almost 7 years? Crazyyy. Anyways, you're an amazing person, and I love hanging around you. =D Amazingly, I remember how we became best friends. Walked into Chinese school, saw you sitting there, and we asked each other, "What are YOU doing here?!" Pretty amusing, if you ask me. xD

I still remember all those handball games we played during recess, and you teaching me to shoot baskets. xP Then after I skipped, luckily 4th and 5th graders still had the same recess, so I still got to see you. And then I left you at Walt Disney when I went to Iron Horse, but we were like, whatever, there's still Chinese school! Then you left for a different Chinese school since they gave you credits... -sighs- I remember all three of us (you, me, Michael) were pretty depressed the last few days of class...

And then seeing you in the Cal hallway my freshman year? Made my day when I realized you'd skipped a grade and were in geometry, because that meant I could see you a year before I anticipated. xD Sort of awkward at first as we literally hadn't talked for two years, but hey, we're all good now. So just want to say that you're an amazing friend, and we're going to be friends forever, right? =D

*****

Lucy!!!

What can I say? You're AWESOME!!! You're amazingly nice and hella smart! It's crazyyy!!! So I've known you for a pretty damn long time too... Hard to believe we're going to be juniors/sophomores next year huh? Then we'll be off to college... Then to work... Or in my case, to the streets. xP I'll call you up and ask you to let me stay with you for a while. You'll probably have like 15 vacation houses around the world and be a trillionaire. By age 25. =]

Anyways, I never really talked to you all that much elementary school, huh? Like I remember we were friends, but not like, close friends. You were mainly with Jillian and Victoria. xD And I was off with Linda. At least, in 2nd grade. But anyways, I'm glad I'm closer to you now; I sort of wish I'd taken the time to get to know you better earlier since you're so amazing!!!

And thanks a BUNCH for helping me in math; I know I was hella annoying more than once, so I have to admire you for putting up with that. =D Anyways, you're an awesome person, and don't forget about little Erica here when you become rich and famous!!!

Enough is ENOUGH.

I get that I didn't do so hot on my tests. Yeah, yeah. I hate myself for it too. I know, I thought I'd do way better. Okay, I'll do better next time. Yeah, I know she got an 800. I'm sorry I didn't, okay? I'll take it again next year maybe. Okay, I'm sorry, I'll make sure I study more so I don't waste your money. Okay, I get that maybe colleges will want to see both. Okay. Got it. Okay. Wait... what? No! I won't fail my SATs! 800 on the math portion? Okay, I can do that. It shouldn't be TOO hard... 2150 total? Uhm, I guess. I mean, Jess only got a 2140... But... I'll go memorize more vocab and stuff. Sure.

Yeah. That's what I say. What goes through my brain is: Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME?! Okay, I get that you expect a lot from me. But I'm not perfect. I'm sorry I totally bombed my French Subject, and didn't do that well on my Math IIC one either. I was hella disappointed in myself too. I looked it up and sort of just went, "Shit." But you know what? I get that. I don't need you to nag me about it. I don't need you to tell me about how I need a 2150 MINIMUM on my SAT. Okay, being honest, I can probably get that if I work hard. But seriously? Minimum? Jess didn't even get that. Why is my minimum higher than her maximum? Really? What. The. Hell.